2019 was a year of breaking down, healing, and letting go for me. I was so down at one point, I was thinking about ending my life. It was very dark and hopeless at the time, I thought it would never end. Do you remember the first time you broke up with your loved one? Or have you experienced losing loved ones in your life? Or maybe there were just so many negative thoughts and events going on, you can’t remember how to be happy again. Time slows down, and everything turns grey in your world. The year of 2019 was like that for me.
December 30th, 2019, I was looking through my pictures in my phone, I was surprised how much good memories I actually had throughout the year, but I could only remember the bad ones for some reason. Then I told myself, this is it, I had enough of these negative and depressing emotions, I want to focus on the good memories.
I asked myself why am I so unhappy? I realized I was waking up thinking about how much it sucked, and I was replaying the heartbreaking moments and people’s hurtful words in my head. As hard as I tried to forget about it, it just kept coming back. I hated being alone, I couldn’t enjoy anything in my life, not even delicious food. So, I told myself: I will focus on the good memories every day!
On December 31st, 2019, I was writing my new year resolution, so I started this challenge that I will write down three positive things each day. At first, it was hard to remember three positive things at the end of the night. I was doing the same things every day, there was nothing special as I told myself. But I forced myself to think of something that is positive like the sky was beautiful when I was heading to work, or like the temperature warmed up to -20 in the freezing cold Alaska. Slowly, I realized that I was way happier than before, my heart lightened and I smiled more. It’s been more than a half year now, I am still keeping up with my new habit. I found myself letting go of the frustration over bad times easier. Think back to the end of year 2019, the negative emotions had consumed me completely and I couldn’t think of any good memories. But now, I am so content with myself and the state I am at, even the bad memories can’t bring me down. I would say I feel amazing!
Along the way I have realized, we need to build new or better habits in life in order to change the way we do things and the way we think. It’s almost like working out, you start doing the easy exercises day in and day out, you will get that dream body one day. Nothing will just happen if we don’t put in the work it needs. So, here comes the conclusion.
YOU have more power over your brain than you think. Your mood, energy, and focus will shift when you control what your brain think. You need to train your brain like the way you would train your body. Give yourself a little challenge, and see how it will change you internally. By focusing the positive things and the good memories in your life will help you to be happier day by day. Grow with me, and share your thoughts with me! Till next time, stay cool my friends~