I have not been working for almost a year now. This year went by very fast. I also kept myself very busy. I finished my Master’s in May, helped my parents remodel their newly bought condo, traveled a ton, and focused on developing myself in many ways. However, I can’t justify continuing with this lifestyle even though I have been doing so many things. I feel guilty because I am not working, I feel stuck at this position because I am not working, I feel like I am not progressing my life because I am not working. As I was trying to move forward, my thoughts were all over the place. I investigated doing business with friends and family, researched potential job positions in a different field, and considered moving into a completely different career by going for more schooling. I am exhausted and lost, and I am like a fly stuck in front of a window. Then I collapsed and broke down in tears and didn’t know how to deal with my emotions.
What do you do in moments like this? I usually go through it myself; I could not talk about it with anyone until I dealt with my sadness and fixed emotions. After I accept my feelings and emotions, I phoned my cousin seeking help. I felt a bit better after talking with her, but I still felt super alone and lost. Lately, I also realized that writing has not been helping me, I get stuck on one emotion and stay there till I feel better, but I am not progressing in thoughts. Later, I got to talk to my best friend, and she said something was so mind-blowing to me. She said, why do you think it’s not ok being in this stage and doing what you do? Many people work their whole lives to have the lifestyle you have to focus on themselves entirely. I realized it’s all in my mind. It’s my mindset I need to adjust. I am the only judge in my life besides God. If I can switch my perspective, what is there not to enjoy about my life right now? I need to focus on the positive things and keep pushing forward. That’s all I can do, and that’s what everyone can do regardless of what situation you are facing. Isn’t it?
I don’t deny the emotions are still there. I am still working on changing my mindset on things. We all go through these types of feelings at moments, and we all have our ways of getting through them. One thing to keep in mind is we create our reality. The more I think I am not grounded and indecisive, sad, guilty, the more I become those things. I need to shake off these thoughts and emotions first and take on different actions. All these negative thoughts are in my mind, I repeat in MY MIND. It’s not in anyone else’s mind. Why do I feel so out of control when I am the only one in control? I am letting my mind playing tricks on me, and I am taking over now.
Thank you for reading till the end. I will keep you posted on how I progress through this stage of my life. I also started a podcast channel with Danny, and I will post the link below. Please share your thoughts with me. You can send me messages here or email me directly. Till next time~